The man walked into the room.
Are you hooked?
Me neither.
The man stormed into the den.
Interested yet?
Nope?
Try this.
The moon-faced creep crashed into the lawyer's den wielding his foot long blade with malice.
Well I am intrigued. What is this creep doing in a lawyer's den swinging a large knife? What will happen next? Lots of good questions and an opening line with potentially chaotic results. Good conflict and tension buried inside the words. We also know this man is a "moon-faced creep" which leads me to think the lawyer is most likely dirty since the man is motivated enough to attack him and that they have probably dealt with each other before. Lots of imagination from just one line and that is what it takes.
The more you re-tell your story, the more solid it becomes. And it all starts with the first line. You don't have long to impress a publisher or agent. If that first line doesn't shine, the only thing the potential agent/publisher's mind is working toward is the next submission right after they email you the same mundane rejection letter they have probably already emailed ten times throughout the day. in order to sell a story, you need to tell it again and again. Only a solid story will sell.
Best wishes,
Anthony David Mitchell
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